Realizing Who Are The Right People To Have Around You

I had the opportunity to spend some time with a few people I don't see often. The first visit was a last minute plan. At first my cousin and I were excited to have a 'girls night' with one of my exs and someone I thought is a friend but have come to realize might not be someone I should surround myself with. Don't get me wrong. I will always consider this person someone that means something to me but after spending the evening with them I realize that it might not be so healthy for me to spend actually time with them. The conversations between this person and my cousin were fun and light hearted but the conversations between us were uncomfortable, harsh, some-what nasty at times. I don't think there was one comment from that evening that made me feel welcomed to be around. They did serve us an awesome dinner and it was a relaxing evening once I was in another room watching Big Brother and SYTYCD. It's a shame that we can't seem to be around each other without snide comments back and forth. I had to make a decision that there just comes no good from spending time with people that are toxic for you and bring you no joy. IF this person were to need a friend I would still be there to a point but from this moment on I have decided that not spending actual time together is the best solution for both parties.
The second friend is someone I don't get a chance to see very often but every time I do, I'm smiling and laughing the entire time. Granted this is not an ex so the dynamics are much different than the first person. haha. Makes a difference I believe. My friend came for an evening and a day. Last night we just hung out and talked with my cousin and her roomy. It was a calm evening and we all laughed at each others stories! Than today I went shopping with them and their daughter. Shopping is not my favorite thing to do but spending time with this person brighten my day and prove to me how a friend should really be treated. Respect, humor, communication, smiles, laughter, love, patience, encouragement. These are just a few words that popped in my head about how spending time with a friend should be. Not once did I feel any negativity or was there a comment that was said from either party that was harmful or hurtful. Complete acceptance of each other and our differences were embraced. Learning who the right people are to surround yourself with can be challenging at times. Lessons that are hard to learn. I am grateful I am able to tell the difference in how a friendship should be like instead of accepting what shit some 'friends' can be in your life. If I want to have a happy joyful life a big part of that is who I surround myself with!